


just guys bein dudes

by RandyRobot



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Blow Jobs, Cunnilingus, First Time Blow Jobs, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Recreational Drug Use, Trans Character, Trans Nishinoya Yuu, brojobs, smoke weed lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-16
Updated: 2018-10-16
Packaged: 2019-08-03 05:20:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16319906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RandyRobot/pseuds/RandyRobot
Summary: “This won’t be weird, right?”“I won’t make it weird dude, you know me.” Noya reached out and punched Tanaka’s chest gently. They shared a long look before Tanaka spoke up again.“Okay fine, do it,” Tanaka swallowed dryly. “Show me.”





	just guys bein dudes

**Author's Note:**

> smoke weed suck dick eat Doritos

It was no secret that Nishinoya and Tanaka were close. Noya practically lived at Tanaka’s house, especially during weekends. They spent practically all their spare time together and would use any excuse to hang out. When they weren’t studying or playing video games they were smoking weed and watching television or just sitting around talking. They talked about sex as much as any other teenage boys did, which was almost constantly. They even watched porn together occasionally. But it was still very startling when Noya suddenly asked Tanaka if he wanted to look at his junk. Tanaka gawked at him, his cheeks taking on a dark pink color.  
“Why?”  
“Why what?”  
“Why would I want to look at your junk?” Tanaka hissed in the loudest whisper he could manage despite knowing they were the only ones in the house.  
“So you don’t freak out when you see one, you know?”  
“I know what they look like Noya.”  
“True, but you’ve never seen one up close in the flesh you fucking virgin.”  
“You’re a virgin too!”  
“Yeah, and us virgins gotta stick together. I’m giving you a golden opportunity here, man.” Noya crossed his arms, jutting out his jaw stubbornly. Tanaka rubbed the bridge of his nose before taking a deep breath.  
“This won’t be weird, right?”  
“I won’t make it weird dude, you know me.” Noya reached out and punched Tanaka’s chest gently. They shared a long look before Tanaka spoke up again.  
“Okay fine, do it,” Tanaka swallowed dryly. “Show me.”  
“Hell yeah,” Noya said, shuffling backward on Tanaka’s bed and starting to tug off his shorts. For some reason, Tanaka was reminded of when Noya had come out to him. Tanaka, not knowing what ‘transgender’ even meant, had congratulated him. He was thankful that Noya had thought it was funny and explained it to him. Maybe it was because he hadn't made that weird that Tanaka trusted him not to make this weird.  
“Come on dude get up here,” Noya said, making Tanaka scramble off where he’d been sitting on the floor to sit in front of where he lay on the bed.  
It was surprisingly less weird and awkward then Tanaka had expected. It was still pretty fucking weird and awkward but it was his best friend so it wasn’t as bad as it could have been. For a long minute, he just sat stiffly and stared. What was the protocol for something like this? Was he allowed to ask questions? Would it be okay for him to get closer? Could he touch it? God, he was too fucking stoned for this shit. Noya was looking at him with a shit eating grin on his face.  
“You look fucking stupid dude,” Noya commented, reaching down between his knees to flick Tanaka’s forehead. “Chillax man, it’s just me.”  
Tanaka closed his eyes and sighed heavily. It was just Noya. He wasn’t gonna make it weird. Everything would be fine, he just needed to relax. He rolled his shoulders before opening his eyes again and leaning down closer.  
“Okay, so like what’s up,” He asked, unsure of what his actual question even was.  
“What’s going down in pussy town?” Noya asked with a laugh.  
“What’s going down in pussy town?” Tanaka repeated with a nod, thankful for Noya breaking the awkward tension somewhat.  
“Right so this bad boy right here is the clitoris,” Noya said, sitting up some and pointing. “Most girls probably won’t have one as big as mine though, that’s normal.”  
“It looks like a dick,” Tanaka commented.  
“Yeah, mine does, it’s from the hormones,” Noya said, pushing it gently with his fingertip.  
“So girls’ won’t look like that?” Tanaka said, tilting his head to the side.  
“They’ll probably be way smaller, yeah,” Noya nodded. “They’ll probably be less hairy too.”  
“Alright,” Tanaka said, leaning on his elbows with a nod.  
“Okay, then there’s some funny business and the actual hole is down here more,” Noya said, watching Tanaka furrow his eyebrows slightly as he pushed the tip of his finger in.  
“Okay,” Tanaka blinked as Noya pulled his fingertip back out.  
“Pro tip if you’re fingering someone do kinda like this with your hand,” Noya curled his middle and ring finger up toward his palm.   
“Like this?” Tanaka asked, copying the gesture with his own hand.  
“Just like that,” Noya said with a grin.  
“Okay, so when I’m going down on someone what do I like...do?” Tanaka asked. Noya leaned back and looked up at the ceiling thoughtfully.  
“Well, you’re gonna want to go slow, especially at first. And when I say go slow I mean like move your tongue slow. Like you're making out slow and romantic like, you know? Try to focus on the clit for the most part. Don’t just lick it either, suck on it some too. And be kinda careful with them, they’re more sensitive than you’d think. You can finger them too if you want. Do like I showed you but work up to it some, don’t just stuff your fingers in right off the bat. And don’t stop until they’re done.” Noya looked back down at Tanaka once he’d finished his spiel. Tanaka was blushing and staring down at his junk again.  
“I...c-can I try it?” Tanaka asked hesitantly, not looking up.  
“You wanna eat me out? I mean, sure go ahead man, more power to ya,” Noya’s ears burned. He really hadn’t expected this outcome, especially with how shy Tanaka had been earlier. Fuck, had he gotten hard talking about eating pussy? Had Tanaka noticed? God, he was too fucking stoned for this right now. He spread his legs a little wider. “I’ll like, coach you through it or whatever?”  
“Okay,” Tanaka said, scooching closer and leaning his head down between Noya’s thighs. Noya’s leg twitched slightly as Tanaka reached out and touched his inner thigh, letting his thumb touch against the junction of his leg and pelvis and spreading him open just slightly. Tanaka ducked his head down and paused hesitantly before closing the last few inches and touching his mouth against Noya’s pussy. It tasted funny, kinda tangy and metallic almost. Go slow Noya had said. Tanaka moved his tongue slowly, letting it drag gently around the folds of Noya’s pussy and trying his best to ignore the pubes in his mouth.  
“Here, hey wait,” Noya said, sitting up and reaching down between his legs to brush his pubes out of the way and spread himself open with his middle and pointer finger. “Okay try that.”  
Tanaka nodded stiffly and ducked his head back down. He rubbed his tongue against Noya’s stiff clit, making Noya’s thighs twitch in time with his movements. This was actually kinda fun now that he got into it. He pulled his head away, licking his lips and making brief eye contact with Noya before going back down, taking Noya's advice and sucking experimentally on his clit. Noya's hand pulled away and Tanaka glanced up, worried he had done something wrong. He was met with the sight of Noya's flushed face and closed eyes as he stifled a moan into the back of his hand. Tanaka looked back down at the hem of his shirt immediately. He felt like he wasn't supposed to see that, Noya having that kind of reaction was private and he shouldn't have looked.   
This was crazy, on top of that reaction Noya was getting really wet too, he could feel it making his chin slick as it rubbed against his opening. Did that mean he was worked up enough that Tanaka could try fingering him? He switched back to licking again, pressing his face into Noya's belly and flattening his tongue, letting it roll back and forth over Noya's clit. Noya moaned again and his hips rolled against Tanaka's mouth. Tanaka decided that yeah, he probably was warmed up enough. He shifted around and let his hand slide down from Noya's inner thigh to his entrance. He paused, ghosting his fingertips gently against Noya's wet hole before pushing his middle and ring fingers inside.  
“Oh fuck!” Noya yelled, only being able to partially muffle the sound with his arm. His back arched forward hard enough his feet lifted off the bed. Tanaka's hand froze and he jerked his head upright.  
“Are you okay?” he asked. Fuck, had he hurt Noya? Were his fingernails too long? Was he not warmed up enough? Noya blinked stupidly at him.  
“What? I'm fine dude don't worry,” Noya gave him a thumbs up before letting his head fall back. “Don't stop Ryuu you're doing really good.”  
Tanaka blushed at the awkward praise, thankful that Noya had looked away before saying that.  
“Shit, man don’t scare me like that,” he muttered as he nuzzled his face back into Noya, confidently moving his lips and tongue against Noya's clit. After a few seconds, he started to move his fingers as well, curling them upward rhythmically like Noya had shown him. Noya’s hips bucked and rolled against Tanaka’s fingers, his breathy moans mingling with the wet slurping sounds Tanaka was making. Tanaka jumped slightly as Noya reached down to grab at his head. He didn’t have enough hair to grab on to so Noya just flattened his palm against the back of his head, shoving it down harder against him. Tanaka took that to mean ‘go faster’ and started to rub his tongue back and forth faster.   
“Oh oh fuck ah aah aaaahha,” Noya twisted his arm around to grip his opposite shoulder in an attempt to block the sound. His moans were muffled into squeaky whines against his arm but his body's reaction was much less easy to control. His back arched and his legs shook and kicked. Tanaka tried to keep up with Noya's thrashing as best he could and let himself get dragged along as Noya rolled to the side and back onto his back. Until Noya arched his back hard enough Tanaka had to sit up to stay in place before dropping suddenly back to the bed, leaving Tanaka behind. Tanaka blinked in surprise and was about to go back in for more when Noya closed his legs shakily. Tanaka looked up at Noya’s face. He was panting hard and shaking, his sleeve connected to his mouth with a string of saliva for a moment as he let it collapse back to his side.  
“A-Are you done?” Tanaka asked hesitantly. Noya nodded rapidly. Tanaka pulled his fingers out, making Noya twitch, and awkwardly reached for a tissue to wipe them off. It took Noya a few seconds to recover and he sat up shakily, running his hand across his sweaty forehead.  
“Shit that was kinda fast, I didn’t expect you to be that good,” Noya said, his cheeks flushed in embarrassment.  
“I just did what you told me too,” Tanaka said, sitting up awkwardly and trying to hide the fact that he had a wicked boner.  
“Well uhh yeah just do like that,” Noya sighed and lay back down again. “When you do it for real.”  
“Right,” Tanaka wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. His tongue was tired and it felt weird to put it back in his mouth all the way so he just held it between his teeth. Noya looked like he was about to fall asleep.  
“Hey, are there any more Doritos left?” Noya asked, cracking open an eye to look at Tanaka.  
“Uhh, yeah there should be,” Tanaka answered.  
“Hell yeah,” Noya bounced off the bed and onto the floor where the half eaten bag of chips sat. Tanaka laughed at him.  
“What, you’re just gonna eat chips on the floor pussy out like a fucking caveman?” Tanaka asked.  
“Says the guy with a fucking hard on,” Noya said accusingly around a mouthful of chips.  
“Oh, you noticed that, huh?” Tanaka shifted awkwardly.  
“Kinda hard to miss Ryuu,” Noya said, sitting cross-legged and turning around to face him.  
“It’s cause my dick is so big,” Tanaka stated. Noya laughed at him.  
“Yeah, sure man whatever you say,” Noya crunched on a chip particularly loud. “I can suck your dick if you want.”  
There was a pause.  
“...What?” Tanaka asked hesitantly.  
“What do you mean what?”  
“I didn’t hear you, your mouth was full of chips.”  
“I said I can suck your dick if you want.”  
“Yeah, that’s what I thought you said.”  
“I did just bust a wicked hot nut on your face, I mean it’s like the least I can do.”  
“Yeah, it’s no big deal. Eye for an eye, right?”  
“You scratch my back, I scratch yours.”  
“Uhh, I can’t think of any more sayings like that.”  
“I can’t either.” Noya dropped the bag of chips back on the floor and crawled back on the bed. Tanaka immediately pushed against Noya’s forehead, stopping his movements.  
“Woah Woah Woah Woah, hold up you’re not sucking my dick like that,” Tanaka said in a panicked voice.  
“What? You want me to put my pants back on?”  
“Fucker you literally have Doritos in your mouth right now.”  
“Ugh, fine give me some water to wash em down with.”  
“Trying to give me Dorito balls I know your game.”  
“My dastardly plan has been foiled!” Noya yelled, grabbing the water bottle from Tanaka and chugging it.  
“Damn straight.”  
“Okay how’s that,” Noya opened his mouth for Tanaka to inspect.  
“Alright, go ahead,” Tanaka leaned back on his elbows.  
“Okay, take your pants off,” Noya tossed the water bottle onto the floor with the chips.  
“All the way off?”  
“Mine are all the way off.”  
“Yeah, okay.”  
Tanaka shimmied out of his sweatpants, letting his dick pop out and slap against his belly. Noya settled down between his legs, laying down and leaning against his thigh.  
“You don’t need me to tell you what to do, right?” Tanaka asked.  
“Nah, I’ve watched porn I got the basic idea.”  
“Okay good cause I wouldn’t know what to tell you,” Tanaka said.  
“Yeah, just like let me know if I fuck up super bad,” Noya gave out a breathy laugh and wrapped his fingers around Tanaka’s shaft. Tanaka watched him rub it gently with his fingers before bringing it to meet his lips. His tongue slid once against the tip before he pushed it into his mouth.  
“Fuck,” Tanaka covered his mouth with his hand and stared up at the ceiling. So this was what all the hype was about. He could see why. It felt fucking amazing. It was almost a shame his best friend was the one doing it. He glanced down at Noya, watching his head bob slowly down the length of his cock. Maybe it wasn’t all that bad that Noya was doing it he thought, reaching down and sliding his fingers into Noya’s hair and making Noya look up at him.  
For a moment they made eye contact, Noya’s eyes reflecting the same worry Tanaka’s had. Had he bitten down too hard by mistake? Was he squeezing too hard? Tanaka’s expression must have cleared the thoughts from his head because he looked back down and went back to sucking again. Tanaka looked back up at the ceiling again. After a few seconds, he found that he couldn’t pretend it was some pretty girl sucking his dick. It was definitely Nishinoya’s hair between his fingers and Nishinoya’s tiny hand rubbing the base of his cock and Nishinoya's mouth wrapped around his length.  
He looked down at Noya again, this time Noya didn’t look back up at him. His eyes traveled down Noya’s body along the sleeve of his hoodie on the arm that wasn’t touching his dick. His spine was twisted so his chest was face down on the bed but his hips were sideways like he was laying on his side and his free hand was shoved down between his legs and moving slightly.  
“Dude, are you touching yourself?” Noya almost choked.  
“Yeah? So what?” Noya sputtered.  
“Why?”  
“Why not?”  
Tanaka blinked stupidly down at him for a beat.  
“You got me there, keep going I guess.”  
Noya huffed and went back to business. Tanaka swallowed dryly and watched Noya’s hand for a minute before Noya noticed and shifted, rolling onto his side fully and spreading his legs so Tanaka could see better. Noya was fingering himself, slowly sliding his fingers in and out. Tanaka blinked out of his stupor, that wasn’t how Noya had showed him. What the hell was he doing? Tanaka watched him for a moment before reaching down Noya’s body. Realizing what Tanaka was up to, Noya pulled his fingers out and let Tanaka’s replace them.  
Then a few things happened at once. Tanaka tugged Noya closer toward him as he started to move his hand. Which caused his cock to slip further into Noya’s throat so naturally he gagged a bit, but because Tanaka’s fingers suddenly rubbed up against his g spot he went to moan at the same time. So the noise he made was a half gag half moan which only barely outshadowed the moan Tanaka let out as his cock slipped down Noya’s throat.  
Noya pulled his mouth off Tanaka’s cock and coughed. Tanaka’s fingers cupped his cheek and tilted his face upward in concern.  
“M’fine,” Noya said, leaning into Tanaka’s palm for a moment before scooching farther up Tanaka’s body and going back to sucking Tanaka’s dick. This time Tanaka was a bit more gentle, moving his fingers slower and doing his best not to tug Noya’s body around too much. A shiver ran up Tanaka’s spine as Noya moaned around his cock. Noya reached down and rubbed his clit with his middle finger. Tanaka huffed breathlessly and moaned in time with Noya.  
“Noya, dude, I’m gonna cum,” Tanaka squeaked. Noya tugged his cock out of his mouth with a breathy moan and stroked it quickly, letting his hips roll against Tanaka’s fingers at the same time.  
It was hard to tell who came first. Maybe they managed to do it at the same time. They were both a little too stoned to tell. Noya yelled, pressing his face into Tanaka’s thigh and squeezed his thighs together around his and Tanaka’s hand. Tanaka leaned over Noya and moaned as his cum shot onto the side of Noya’s face and ear. They continued to work their hands, their bodies shaking violently until Tanaka pulled his fingers back out and grabbed Noya’s wrist to make him stop. Noya tugged himself up Tanaka’s body and collapsed with his head on Tanaka’s chest, wiping the jizz off his neck with his hand.  
“Dude, can you grab me a tissue?” Noya asked breathlessly. Tanaka stretched his arm to grab a tissue and handed it to Noya. Noya scrubbed his face and ear to the best of his ability and dropped the tissue behind Tanaka on the bed, letting his arm drape over his waist. They lay there for a good long while, catching their breath tangled in each other’s arms and legs until Tanaka broke the silence.  
“Dude, where’d you leave those Doritos?” Tanaka asked, tapping the back of Noya’s head and sitting upright.  
“I know right, nothing makes me want chips like busting a fat nut,” Noya said, sitting up and reaching over the side of the bed for the chips and water.  
They gorged on chips in pantsless silence until Tanaka spoke up again.  
“Dude are we still virgins?” Noya thought for a minute.  
“I don’t know man, I mean we kinda fucked but we didn’t like fuck you know?”  
“Yeah, that’s what I was thinking.”  
“What do you think?”  
“I think we’re still virgins cause we didn’t fuck for real. But now we have arcane fuck knowledge.”  
“Dude, Ryuu, that’s the most badass way you could have said that.”  
“I know right!”  
“Hell yeah.”  
Tanaka grinned, Noya had said he wouldn’t make it weird and somehow he really hadn’t. He had a feeling this wouldn’t dampen their friendship at all if anything it had just made them closer. Now they had arcane fuck knowledge and hey, maybe they’d even do this again sometime.

**Author's Note:**

> “What, you’re just gonna eat chips on the floor pussy out like a fucking caveman?” is the rawest line of dialogue I've ever written. I love writing these two.


End file.
